How to Prevent Holiday Regression Syndrome
The holiday season is often portrayed as a time of joy, connection, and celebration—but for many adults, teens, and children, it can trigger an emotional setback known as holiday regression syndrome. This phenomenon involves slipping back into old behaviors, emotional patterns, or family dynamics that a person has worked hard to outgrow. At NJCCBT, we frequently see clients experience heightened stress, anxiety, and interpersonal tension during this time of year.
In this article, we’ll explore what holiday regression syndrome is, why it happens, and evidence-based strategies to prevent emotional regression during the holidays. If you’re looking for ways to maintain your mental health, support your children, or reduce stress as the holiday season approaches, feel free to reach out to us at 201-669-1369 x1 to learn more about NJCCBT’s services.
What Is Holiday Regression Syndrome?
Holiday regression syndrome refers to the emotional and behavioral setbacks people experience when confronted with the unique pressures of the holiday season. This can include returning to patterns such as:
People-pleasing
Emotional outbursts
Avoidance
Overwhelm or shutdown
Heightened anxiety
Perfectionism
Old coping mechanisms (e.g., numbing, emotional eating)
For children and teens—especially those in therapy—this can look like a temporary return to earlier developmental behaviors such as clinginess, irritability, sleep issues, or reduced emotional regulation.
Adults often experience regression when returning to childhood homes or stepping back into old family roles. Even individuals who have made significant therapeutic progress may feel pulled into outdated patterns.
Why Holiday Regression Happens
1. Family Dynamics Re-Trigger Old Patterns
Returning to the environment where you first learned emotional habits can automatically reactivate them. Even well-intentioned families may fall back into familiar roles.
2. Increased Stress and Expectations
Holiday responsibilities—social gatherings, travel, financial strain—activate the nervous system. Stress makes it harder to use healthy coping skills.
3. Sensory and Schedule Overload
For children, neurodivergent individuals, or adults with anxiety, the change in routine and sensory overstimulation can cause emotional fatigue.
4. Pressure to Create the “Perfect Holiday”
High expectations, comparison culture, and social media create pressure that can harm emotional well-being.
5. Grief, Loneliness, or Seasonal Depression
The holidays amplify feelings of loss or disconnection, which can increase vulnerability to regression.
How to Prevent Holiday Regression Syndrome
Below are evidence-based strategies used in our therapeutic programs to help families maintain regulation through the holiday season.
1. Set Clear Emotional Boundaries Before Holiday Events
Healthy boundaries are essential to preventing emotional regression. Consider setting limits on:
Length of time spent at gatherings
Topics that feel triggering
Number of events you commit to
Roles you are willing (and unwilling) to take on
Tip: Practice a boundary script:
“I’m excited to see everyone, but I’ll be leaving by 7 p.m.”
2. Maintain Daily Routines Whenever Possible
One of the biggest drivers of regression, especially for kids, is losing structure. During the holiday season, aim to keep:
Bedtimes consistent
Meal routines predictable
Regular time for breaks and quiet
If your child struggles with emotional regulation, maintaining routines can significantly limit holiday regression.
3. Use Grounding and Mindfulness Techniques
Mindfulness reduces reactivity and keeps you anchored in the present moment. Our CBT and DBT therapists often teach grounding skills such as:
Deep breathing
Body scans
Mindful pauses before responding
These tools help prevent slipping into old emotional habits.
4. Prepare for Family Triggers Ahead of Time
This includes identifying:
Which situations trigger you
What emotions typically arise
How you want to respond instead
Creating a “holiday coping plan” is an excellent way to stay grounded. Group therapy clients often practice these plans together to feel more prepared.
5. Build in Time for Recovery and Rest
Plan for:
Downtime between events
Breaks from socializing
Solo walks or quiet moments
Activities that replenish your energy
This is crucial for both adults and children.
6. Talk with Your Therapist or Join a Holiday Support Group
Group psychotherapy offers a strong sense of community and accountability during stressful seasons.
Understand triggers
Practice emotional regulation skills
Role-play boundary-setting
Reduce isolation
Maintain therapeutic gains
If you or your child are at risk for holiday regression, a group setting provides support and structure during a challenging season.
7. Create Realistic Expectations for the Holidays
Perfectionism fuels stress. Instead, aim for meaningful, not flawless.
Ask:
What matters most to us this year?
What can we let go of?
What actually brings joy?
This reframing often prevents emotional setbacks.
8. Support Kids with Predictability and Emotional Coaching
To improve emotional regulation, children may need:
Extra connection
Clear expectations
Visual schedules
Reminders of coping tools
Permission to take breaks
When to Seek Extra Support
If you or your child experience:
Heightened anxiety
Increased conflicts
Shutdown or withdrawal
Behavioral regression
Difficulty coping with family events
…it may be helpful to speak with a professional. NJCCBT’s family psychotherapy, group psychotherapy, and individual psychotherapy services can provide a supportive, structured environment that reduces stress and creates community during the holiday season.
Final Thoughts: You Can Prevent Holiday Regression with Support and Planning
Holiday regression syndrome is common—but preventable. With boundaries, mindfulness, emotional preparation, and support, you can maintain your mental health and protect the progress you’ve worked hard to build.
If you or your child is seeking additional support to navigate the holidays with confidence, call NJCCBT at 201-669-1369 x1 to learn more about our services and skilled care team.
